This has been like such a long time since I've written in this, and since i'm not being effective tonight, I guess it's as good as any other time to blog.

I'm so exhausted from The Pearl printing last night. We printed in color and we only had my printer, it was not very pretty at all. I think that I'm pretty much pooped from that. I went to sleep around 04h00 or so and I woke around 08h30. Ok, so not 3 hours like I told some people, but more like 4h30. I needed some break from thinking (mostly about him) and well I enjoyed it while it lasted. However, I realized that for the last month and a half or so, it's been Pearl Pearl Pearl and not much else, so I'm in need of this night off from The Pearl.

I think this was the cleanest issue on the backside (layout), printing was hellish, like usual. But I mean, it wasn't too bad. It was just the length of doing the printing. I hope to god the printing won't be hellish, though I know it will be with 12 pages and therefore we'll have problems printing because of the length. (sigh)

On the classes side of things, I totally feel non-comitted to anything in my Learning Cluster. Right now I feel like I'm not really committed to doing much and that this will be a huge failure. I only really get this feeling on my b/c/d/f papers, so we'll see how I end up fixing this lack of motivation problem I'm having right now. On the other hand, I got phone calls and emails from the places I contacted on Wednesday and I think that I may be able to use the information they give me in my paper. The majority of my lazyness is on the part of how huge this class looks. I feel that I'm expected to solve this problem, or at least do something like on the scale of my Extended Essay [20 sources, 3 months of research and writing, hours of meetings with advisors] and I'm afraid of comitting myself to anything that horrendously. This especially because I feel that I was fucked over in the topic I chose and I fucked myself over in doing the project because I didn't commit to it strongly. This is odd logic at it's best: I'm afraid of committing to something because in the past I under-committed myself to a similar project.

(Wait)